If this feels like a battle, these are the rules – Rules 17 & 18

24.12.2023

Author: Shiri Ben-Arzi, PMC, MCC

This is the 9th blog post in the series of blog posts called –

If this feels like a battle, these are the rules –  20 Rules for times of crisis”.

(and it’s a perfect opportunity to thank  Sasha Khazanov and Dr. Cherie Carter-Scott for their inspiration).

 

In this post, I’ll address rules 17 and 18.

(to read the previous post about rules 1-16, click HERE )

 

Rule #17 – 

I believe in miracles.

I believe they are manifestations of goodness, humanity, and love, and we often tend to overlook them, expecting a spectacular Hollywood version of what a miracle should look like.

Set an intention to notice the daily, ordinary, AND extraordinary miracles that come in various shapes, sizes, and colors.

They can be anything from waking up in the morning in your own bed, being able to eat when you are hungry, having the freedom to move, being safe from violence and abuse, seeing nature, enjoying music and food, spending time with loved ones, listening to children playing or the birds chirping, to taking a deep breath and many more things.

 

Rule #18 –

Baby steps are not just for babies. They are a powerful coping and healing strategy.

Baby steps require that we be compassionate with ourselves. Sometimes, we will need to take baby steps on the path to self-compassion.

Here are five self-compassion baby steps:

1. Give your kind words of acknowledgment during the day for things done.
2. Gently pat yourself on the shoulder for doing what you can.
3. Surround yourself with love.
4. Give yourself permission to receive support, help, love, and gestures of kindness.
5. Focus on exhaling and let out a sigh (give yourself permission to make it a loud one) it regulates the nervous system.

 

In the next blog post, I will address the last two rules, 19 and 20.