Coaching Clients with Fear of Recurrence

06.1.2019

Coaching Clients with Fear of Recurrence

We tend to think about Rear of Recurrence in the context of cancer but this is true for every illness.

Even if you are coaching a client in “NED” status (No Evidence of Disease), that feels less symptomatic, experiences an improvement in his/her medical condition or simply feels better, there is always that fear that things might get deteriorate again and onset the worst case scenario.

Fear of Recurrence can be overwhelming and crippling.
Every little pain or irregularity in the way the body behaves, an upcoming medical exam or procedure or even a thought about what might be can send our client straight to that worst case scenario and bring on a wave of fear and panic.

I want to give you 5 tools to help your client deal with this fear when it come up:

1. Grounding
   grounding techniques are a way to “ground” ourselves in the present moment, balance ourselves emotionally and regain connection with present internal and/or external resources.
   Pick one technique: whether it’s breathing, visualization, using the 5 senses or anything else that works for the client.

2. Remind the client that he/she are more than the illness
   The illness is something the client has or had in the body.
   The client also has elbows, fingers, toes. The client is more the elbows, fingers or toes in the same way that he/she is more than the body and more than the illness.
   The illness is one more thing in the client’s life, it’s not the only thing and it is not who he/she is.
3. Remind the client where the true control is
   Here is a fact of life: we have no control of things that happen to us. We have no control over the world, other people and our bodies.
   The most fundamental human choice we have is the meaning we choose to give to things that happen to us. Where there is a choice – there is control.
   Since we see the world through the meaning we give it (our perception), when we choose the meaning  – we control our subjective experience.

4. Name the real fear
   Many times fear of recurrence is not really about the recurrence of the illness. Sometimes it’s something else. It can be that the client is afraid of pain, of needing to be helped, of feeling helpless, of dying, of losing something … it can be many things.
   This doesn’t insecurely make it easier but it does create clarity and clarity increases choice.
   To get to the real fear invite the client to imagine (just for a few seconds) that there is a recurrence or deterioration and ask him/her to notice the first thing that comes to mind. That is where the real fear is.
   * Make sure you have set safely anchors with the client before doing this.

5. Speak the faith
   whether its religious, spiritual or anything else, invite the client to say out loud what he/she believe in.
   Ask the client to repeat it 5 times, loud enough for him/her to hear their own voice.

 

If you found this useful share it with someone else that can benefit from it.

 

Let’s keep making this world a better place to live.

 

Shiri Ben-Arzi.

Master Medical Coach

CEO of MCI – the Medical Coaching Institute