If this feels like a battle, these are the rules – Rules 19 & 20

25.12.2023

Author: Shiri Ben-Arzi, PMC, MCC

This is the 10^th and last blog post in the series of blog posts called – If This Feels Like A Battle, These Are The Rules – 20 Rules For Times Of Crisis”.

A special Thank You to Sasha Khazanov and Dr. Cherie Carter-Scott for their inspiration.

 

In this post, I’ll address rules 19 and 20.

(to read the previous post about rules 1-18, click HERE )

Rule #19 –

There is no timeline for this journey. It’ll take as much as it’ll take.

And while it’s taking the time it needs, it’s important to remember that

1. Our heart holds the compass, and it’s important to listen to it.
2. There are no “positive” or “negative” emotions – there are only human emotions, and all of them are natural human responses to crises.
3. Feeling sadness, fear, frustration, and despair does not mean we are weak – on the contrary, when we allow ourselves to feel them, we become stronger.
4. We all become fragile when navigating through times of crisis. That is part of what it means to be human.
5. Giving ourselves permission to “break” means allowing ourselves to heal and grow.

 

Rule #20 –

There are no rules!

• There is no one true absolute truth, no “one right way,” and no “one size fits all.”
• The right path to recovery is the one we create for ourselves. It is different from one person to another.
• Change comes gradually, and at times, it will feel like a dance where we take two steps forward and one step back.
• Stick to what’s best for you.
• Be compassionate and forgiving to yourself.
• Be patient with the pace at which you move.
• Focusing on your well-being and what you need is not selfishness; it is a commitment to your own well-being. And healing.
• GOD is in the little things.
• Ask for help when you need it.

 

In this series of blog posts, I used the war metaphor to create a 20-rule roadmap to navigate through crises.

War metaphors are just one way of looking at things.

I invite you to find your own metaphors, create your own road map, and share them with the world.